ED spreads like California wildfire!
January 7, 2009Porn Kings to D.C. – Help Us Through Hard Times
Joe Francis and Larry Flynt claim the economy has made America’s sexual appetite go limp, so they’re going to the one place where sex is always rampant — Congress.
Flynt (the “Hustler” guy) and Francis (the “Girls Gone Wild” dude) are asking the government for a $5 billion bailout, claiming the adult entertainment industry has taken a huge shot to the face because of the downturn — citing the fact that XXX DVD sales are down 22% from a year ago.
“With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind,” Flynt says. “It’s time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America.”
Francis sees his industry like the big three automakers, only BIGGER: “Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation’s most important businesses; we feel we deserve the same consideration.”
Francis says he’s going to D.C. to personally make the pitch. Sounds like someone has a bone to pick.
Filed under: Celebrity Justice
My comment: I’ve found that swallowing the 3-day Cialis combined with a 1-day Cialis and a Viagra chaser can really, really make me want to go find a XXX DVD. Republicans have known this for years, I’m told. But then, I stay away from the illicit pharmaceuticals and street junk, unlike many of them.
Hollywood will be lobbying against this bailout since XXX DVDs still outsell the ‘legitimate’ type movies, which is the real ‘cover-up’ in the good ol’ USA.
UPDATE: This story is everywhere… maybe it is legit!
Uncle Sam to Spend $5 Billion on Porn?
by Bill Bradley
January 7, 2009, 12:39 pm
In better days.
First the banks needed a bailout. Then the Big Three. Even the steel industry is in hard times. But, now, TMZ reports, the porn industry is, well, fucked. Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild mastermind Joe Francis are headed to Washington, seeking a $5 billion bailout. $5 billion, for porn? The White House gave General Motors and Chrysler $17.4 billion in emergency aid. And cars are certainly more expensive to produce than two blandly attractive blondes dressed as Swedish police officers on top of a billiards table under soft lighting.
According to Flynt, the porn industry is hard up for cash amid the, er, softening economy:
With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It’s time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America.
Tom Johansmeyer at the Atlantic points out that free Web sites like RedTube and PornHub have screwed over the porn industry by giving away their content for free. But that isn’t stopping Francis Koenig, founder and C.E.O. of the first porncentric hedge fund, AdultVest. He seems to be raking in the cash, with his fund up 50 percent this year, “based on ‘very conservative’ outside appraisals.” And he thinks that the future of porn is bright. What with iPorn in his portfolio—a startup developing an application for iPods—the sky’s the limit. Porn, on the subway!
It’s too bad Larry Craig’s not in the Senate anymore. He’d be the perfect person to spearhead a bailout bill.
–from Vanity Fair
